We’re very serious people, people. We have jobs to do, responsibilities. We have no time for frivolity or “fun”. Good god man, we’re laser-focused on preparing our estate for retirement. There is no time for silliness.

The wife and I entered into a contract 25 years ago today, the terms of which were made public and binding. There were witnesses, and documents were signed. We have honored that contract adequately, and have surely met expectations.

We have contributed 2.0 children to the population, and I will submit that they are of high quality, though I will stipulate that they at times have been rather preposterous.

I assure you that tomorrow we will continue fulfilling our contract and all that it requires. This evening, however, we will be observing the 25-year mark but will take no responsibility for any “ridiculousness” or “irresponsible” occurrences. Any photographic evidence to the contrary will be vociferously contested.
Thank you, that is all.




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